Week 7 - Meeting Aesclepius

As I've said several times, I do not find visualizing on command easy, particularly images of people.  Therefore, I do not get much out of meditations where I am instructed to visualize a person...especially one that I have to conjure up with my imagination.  I understand what we are supposed to experience, this just isn't the right way for me to do it.  I've been looking through some meditations on Youtube and found some to be more "my thing". 

"One cannot lead another where one has not gone himself" means that you can not preach what you do not practice.  You can't teach your patients about the effects of a quiet mind if you have never experienced it.  If we have proof (and I think we do) that there are positive health effects of self-reflection then the medical community does have an obligation to at least make patients aware.  Do I personally have an obligation to my patients to develop myself in this way?  I'm not sure about that...I guess if you feel that I have an obligation to be thin, not smoke, etc. then yes....but while I may have an obligation to myself, I think that what I do with my personal life is personal.  My obligation to my patients is to make sure that they are aware of practices that can bring them good health.  I can direct them toward information if they are interested. 

Week 6...Taking Inventory

First, the loving-kindness exercise...I understand the premise of this activity but I still find that these exercises are forced.  I think that if I were to practice it daily, it may actually begin to affect the way that I think for the better.  Like most people, in lots of ways I'm self-absorbed and don't necessarily see the suffering of others.  I may be annoyed with the rude cashier at Walmart without knowing that she just had a horrible experience and that is why she didn't say "Thank you". (Or maybe she's just rude, I'll never know...but that's the point, I don't know).  I'd like to find an exercise that feels a bit more natural to cultivate kindness in myself.

As for my self assessment, I feel that without much meditation I know what I need to work on.  As I mentioned in previous posts, I had an issue that started in the "interpersonal" area which caused glaring problems in the biological, worldly, and psychospiritual areas of my life.   What I really need is a good forgiveness meditation!  Through this class, our reading, and the meditation class I'm taking, I'm trying to figure out how to get myself to the next level of development.

The Subtle Mind

Yes! This was my type of mind exercise. I loved it. I didn't have to visualize anything, just focus on breathing. A few weeks ago I would have had an extremely difficult time quieting my mind. Actually, it's still not easy, but I feel like I'm making progress. I have moments that I'm successful in just witnessing thoughts without attaching myself to them. This exercise was much more enjoyable (and less frustrating) than Loving-Kindness. I have difficulty conjuring up images on demand, and have started to find it anxiety-producing as I keep thinking, "I'm never going to get this"! Since this class began, I've discovered that I live only a few miles from the main Kadampa Meditation Center in Glen Spey, NY. They offer local classes in the community, so I decided, "What the heck!" and tried one out. I was a bit intimidated as I thought I'd find a bunch of weirdly-happy people with shaved heads chanting... not at all. It was regular people who gather together to do some self-reflection through meditation. I enjoyed it so much that I signed up for next weeks class. We have to remember that the mind and body are one in order to reach our potential in life. We can't have ultimate health unless we care for our physical, mental and spiritual components of who we are. For some people, this means practicing yoga, others meditation...for me it generally means being out in nature. Adding meditation has been a great experience.

Mental workout

A mental workout is exercise for the mind, in the same way that a physical workout is exercise for the body. We improve the health of our mind step by step, always expanding on what we've previously accomplished. This is similar to physical exercise. We gradually build our muscles or improve the condition of our heart; No one starts off as an Olympic body builder. I find it very interesting that, according to our reading, there is a limit to biological fitness, but the mind appears capable of unlimited development. Recent studies show that exercises, such as meditation and relaxation, can actually cause new cellular pathways to form in the brain. At first this seems astonishing, but why would the brain be different than any other organ of the body? For example, when we push ourselves physically, (such as training for a marathon), we develop collateral circulation to handle our blood volume. Likely, the brain is developing new pathways to handle the new information, feeling, emotions, etc. I am very new to meditation...a few weeks at most. Still, I'm starting to notice a bit of progress. (If there were 1000 levels to meditation, I'd have to say I'm at level 2, at most), but I can definitely feel something different... and better. I enjoyed the loving-kindness exercise very much. I still have trouble maintaining focus and frequently have to bring myself back to my breathing. When the recording said, "choose a person you feel love and tenderness for" my brain was jumping all over the place, from person to person. I finally settled for my youngest daughter who was the easiest to concentrate on (probably because she's too young to have really gotten me angry yet). I hope to eventually be able to extend loving-kindness to everyone.

Reflections during a busy holiday week

There's nothing better than a few relaxation exercises during a hectic holiday week! My strongest area of wellbeing would be physical. I'm generally healthy, eat pretty well, and I exercise regularly. If I had to assign a number I would give myself a 7. Still, I do need to make improvements. At one time I loved to run. I was quite competitive. I dedicated time to training. As I've gotten older, I've gotten lazier...or busier. My workout time is more sporadic and I find myself coming up with excuses. Also, although my diet is decent, I find myself eating things I wouldn't have touched a few years ago. I really want to work on these areas. I have a difficult time determining what is involved in spiritual health. During the warm months of the year I spend as much time outdoors as possible. I love to garden, hike, raft on the Delaware river, which is about 2 miles from where I live. I also camp, frequent the ocean, etc. I believe that this connection to nature gives me a spiritual level of 6. Still, I think that as humans, most of us need to feel a connection to God or other superior being. Although I "believe", this connection is where I fall short in my spiritual health. I feel a need to get back to church. I know that a church is just a place, but there is a sense of belonging there that I like. Under normal circumstances I would have rated my self at an 8 or 9 for psychological well being. However, I've had a few experiences over the last 13 months that have put me much lower. If I actually had to assign a number I'd say 3. What can I do about it? I'm not sure. I guess they say that time heals all wounds. I think that meditation can help, but I'm very new at it and not exactly sure what I'm doing. I enjoyed this week's relaxation exercise much more than ones we did previously. I have a hard time with visualization, but for some reason colors came easy to me. It's not easy for me to relax. After 10 minutes I find myself getting anxious to move onto something new. Definitely a problem because I realize how much I need to be still.

Relaxation Exercise

Well, if there is one thing that I discovered it's that it's difficut to find a place to relax in my house. I definately plan to try the exercise again, (in my bedroom with the door locked). It wasn't so easy to complete the exercise with the dogs barking, my husband talking, etc. Still, I did feel that my arms were very heavy and difficult to lift from my lap. I truly feel I can benefit from this type of technique. For quite some time, I've felt that I need to add relaxation exercises to my life. I had an extremely stressful situation which caused my several physical problems. I wish I had some knowledge of consciousness and healing when the problem began...but I'm here now!

Welcome to my Wellness Blog

Hello everyone. Feel free to check out my blog frequently as I hope to make improvements as I become more comfortable. This is my first blogging experience. -Lisa